More articles by and about Janet Pfeiffer:

Even Experts Baffled by the 'Why' of Newtown Massacre
by Lorraine Ash, The Daily Record

Even as local experts on child psychology and anger offered healthy ways to respond to the Newtown massacre, they say they, too, can't explain it.

"How does someone decide in their mind that shooting 6-year-old kids makes sense?" asked Richard Dauber, a clinical child psychologist with Morris Psychological Group in Parsippany.

"Unless the young man was writing things down or talking to somebody, it's hard for anyone, no matter how much education they have, to understand why he did it," said Dauber, who holds a doctorate and has been a psychologist for 30 years.

Being able to answer the question 'Why?' would help people achieve a sense of security, he said, because they can protect themselves from what they understand.

He emphasized, however, that there are a lot of people who have psychological problems, but very few who will commit such a violent and horrific act.

Michelle Borden, a licensed clinical social worker and chief operating officer of the Montville-based NewBridge Services, supervises the agency's school-based programs, among other duties

"Even for a seasoned professional, this was a really difficult event to confront," Borden said. "The emotions of what happened were overwhelming, even to me, and I'm a disaster response crisis counselor."

Like Dauber, she said that adults ultimately will need to live with not knowing.

"We may not ever really understand," Borden said. "With a lot of the perpetrators of violence, there often are more questions left unanswered than there are answers."

Meanwhile, Janet Pfeiffer of Jefferson Township, author of 'The Secret Side of Anger,' traces issues of violence to an overall moral decay and an eroding sense of compassion that must be rejuvenated and applied to encompass all Americans, one for the other, including those with mental illness. Compassion, she said, mitigates anger.

The only antidote to senseless violence, according to Pfeiffer, are individuals leading spiritually healthy lives focused on loving others and collectively creating an inclusive society. "As individuals, we have to make sure we pay attention to our own attitudes and behaviors," she said.

While adults, even as they grieve, can accept an unsafe world or act to change it, children can do neither. Borden advocated regaining normalcy and imposing calm for children who may now feel unsafe.

Dauber offered suggestions, starting with shielding young children from being bombarded by the issue by turning off the TV at home. "At the same time, you want to be honest with them," he said, "because they will hear things. The first thing is to find out what they've heard or what they know and to try and address some of their concerns. Tell younger kids that there was a school shooting and that children did die. But at the same time reassure them that it's not going to happen in their school."

Being specific about all the safety precautions taken on their behalf can alleviate their anxiety, he said, which is the goal. Some children may not talk about their fears but experience trouble eating or sleeping properly."Or they wind up with stomachaches or headaches, or they may not want to go to school," Dauber said.

Those, too, are symptoms of anxiety, he added, and a sign a child needs help from the adults in his or her life.

Meet the Marriage Killer: How to Stop Nagging Your Spouse
By Elizabeth Bernstein

Excerpt: Ken Mac Dougall bit into the sandwich his wife had packed him for lunch and noticed something odd - a Post-it note tucked between the ham and the cheese. He pulled it out of his mouth, smoothed the crinkles and read what his wife had written: "Be in aisle 10 of Home Depot tonight at 6 p.m."

Mr. Mac Dougall was renovating the couple's Oak Ridge, N.J., kitchen, and his wife had been urging him to pick out the floor tiles. He felt he had plenty of time to do this task. She felt unheard.

"I thought the note was an ingenious and hysterical way to get his attention," says his wife, Janet Pfeiffer (whose occupation, interestingly enough, is a motivational speaker), recalling the incident which occurred several years ago. Her husband, a technician at a company that modifies vehicles for handicapped drivers, didn't really see it that way. "I don't need a reminder in the middle of my sandwich," he says.

Marriage counselors warn that nagging is one of the leading causes for discord and divorce, Elizabeth Bernstein reports on Lunch Break.

Read the whole article: Meet the Marriage Killer: How to Stop Nagging Your Spouse

Don't Mess with This C.H.I.L.D
By Stacey Gill

Excerpt: In light of recent high profile bullying incidents prompting the New Jersey legislature to enact stricter bullying laws, which took effect at the start of the new school year, the free lecture, 'Don't Mess with Me: The Connection between Self-Esteem and Bullying,' couldn't be more timely.

On Wednesday, October 12, the non-profit parent organization, Children Having Individual Learning Differences (C.H.I.L.D), will host international motivational speaker and award-winning author Janet Pfeiffer to address the community on this critical topic. An NJEA Registered Provider specializing in bullying, anger management and conflict resolution, Pfeiffer will discuss the importance of self-esteem and how it impacts our lives from career choice to the selection of a mate. Pfeiffer will also examine the correlation between a child's self worth and bullying as well as what can be done to help children build positive self-esteem.

Read the whole article: Don't Mess with This C.H.I.L.D

Workplace Anger: It's All the Rage
By Janet Pfeiffer
Employee Relations Today

Excerpt: We've all experienced anger in the workplace. A certain amount is expected and considered normal in any business. Yet in recent years angry outbursts seem to be on the rise both in frequency and intensity.

Of late, we've witnessed such shocking incidences as Omar Thorton's massacre at the Hartford Beer Distributors in Manchester, Conn. and Steven Slater's verbal tirade and dramatic departure from a JetBlue airplane. Both disgruntled employees chose hostile and aggressive ways of expressing their anger over what they claimed was their unhappiness and unfair treatment on the job.

Most of us can relate to each of these men and the frustration and discontent they felt over what they perceived as a hostile work environment. Yet there are countless others who are equally as dissatisfied with their jobs yet do not behave in such a deplorable manner. What causes some employees to react so violently and what can an employer do to lessen the chance of this happening within their company?

Read the entire article: Workplace Anger: It's All the Rage

Written by Bob Goldman 'Getting Angry About Getting Angry'

Excerpt: "I'm really angry. The press release announcing Janet Pfeiffer's new book, "The Secret Side of Anger," arrived in my inbox last May, but it was only today that I noticed it. I could blame Apple, who made my computer, or Google, who runs my browser, or the local Burger Barn, which has been running special deals on quadruple bacon burgers -- they have totally occupied my attention and my stomach, keeping me somewhat logy.

Whoever is to blame, I plan to rectify their error right now by giving this important new book the publicity it deserves. Or I certainly will do so just as soon as I finish this burger."

My Business: Pfeiffer Power Seminars Randolph Roxbury IN

Excerpt: Why did you start the business? Janet Pfeiffer: I actually began as a children's author. After my first book-signing in a Hoboken school, the principal asked me if I could provide staff training on anger management. I wrote and presented a 1 1/2-hour program (which has grown to a full eight-hour lecture) and realized this was my calling: to help others be less angry, resolve their disagreements easier, get along better with others and generally live a more peaceful and prosperous life. Read entire article

Workplace violence remains difficult to tackle CNN Living -

Excerpt: Janet Pfeiffer, an anger management expert, says employers should try to address the fears, frustrations and stress that employees are experiencing before workplace problems escalate. She said precipitating emotions can often be the cause of workplace violence. Particularly amid a bad economy, many employees are more likely to feel overwhelmed.

Laying someone off -- as seen in the Connecticut workplace shooting rampage -- could cause an employee to snap, Pfeiffer said.

She admits it can be hard for employers and managers to spot early warnings signs. Oftentimes, angry co-workers will keep their feelings hidden until something causes them to erupt.

"Part of the danger is that there is a lot of emotion lurking inside of people," Pfeiffer said. "A lot of the time, the individuals themselves aren't clear what they are feeling."

Baby Halle's Story: From Horror to Healing

The dog was 'too old,' so they threw her away. That's when I found her, huddled in a cage at an animal shelter.

It was October of 2002. I was on another routine visit to the animal shelter to drop off supplies when I saw Baby Halle. I bent down by the cage and called her over. As she approached, her body language clearly indicated that she had been abused. I put my hand near the bars of the cage. She licked my finger and wrapped her paw around my arm, tugging with all her might. A gut-wrenching cry emanated from her soul in a desperate plea for me to save her. I knew instantly that I wanted to take her home with me.... Continue (By Janet Pfeiffer, PETA Blog)

The Positive Side to Anger

Anger is not inherently negative. It is an important and useful emotion that can be used as a motivating force to bring about positive change. If I witness an injustice in society, my anger can serve as a propellant to create new laws. (The Inspiration Report, Beliefnet.com)

PETA: Channeling Your Anger Into Positive Energy

...One of my dogs was rescued from medical testing... Initially, my anger served to alert me to an injustice (something was wrong and needed my attention). Once I identified it, I refocused my energy on finding and implementing a solution. I became much more involved in the cause of animal rights by educating folks and helping out when I could by donating to organizations that work on those issues. My anger has turned into a resolution and a solid conviction to fight this injustice wherever it exists and however I can. (By Janet Pfeiffer, PETA - Guest Blogger)

ACS Seminar: C-Factor Raising Confident, Capable Compassionate and Caring Kids

The Army Community Service seminar, the C-Factor, was presented by Janet Pfeiffer, a motivational speaker and award-winning author, July 9. Although it may have been geared towards parents of teen-aged children there was something for all parents during the seminar 'The C-Factor, Raising Confident, Capable, Compassionate and Caring Kids.' (By Robyn Bennett, Public Affairs Office, Monmouth Message)

Jefferson Author Explains How to Harness Anger

Pfeiffer, who has raised four children alone and survived a physically abusive relationship, has learned how to process anger. She teaches that skill to the clients she works with one-on-one and to everyone who takes her seminars. (By Lorraine Ash, Daily Record)

Decline In Values Easy to See in Television

What kinds of messages are today's television shows sending - and what does this reveal about the tragic state of our values? (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Tired of Feeling Crabby? Read the 'Anger Cure'

Janet Pfeiffer coaches a 'crabby' young woman by teaching her to explore her feeling of anger, understand her emotions, and communicate her feelings of frustration in a positive manner. In this article, you'll find some great tips on what to do when you're upset and learn about 'Fighting Fair'. (By Janet Pfeiffer, Woman's World)

Don't Be Too Quick to Judge Obese Man

People need to be less judgmental of one another. To assume that overweight people are lazy and irresponsible is unfair and harsh. Some have legitimate health issues that make it difficult to maintain a healthy weight. For many, overeating is more of an emotional issue. Cruel remarks leave lasting scars upon the heart... (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Too Many Ill-Suited to Owning Handguns

Is it our constitutional right to bear arms? Yes. Is it an intelligent choice? In this day and age, I don't believe so. The unmonitored citizen with a firearm, in my opinion, runs a much higher risk of impaired thinking under duress and possibly committing a tragic error. And don't forget those who are suffering with undiagnosed emotional and mental health issues. Many go undetected by society and might possibly pass any tests needed to legally acquire and carry a firearm... (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Arrogance and Ego Have No Place on Ballfield

Not all adults can enjoy a children's sporting event and actually behave like adults. Adults need to get a grip on their emotions, maintain their composure under pressure and act as good role models, showing kids how resolve disputes with dignity and maturity. (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Respect for Human Dignity is the Answer

Respect for human rights is the foundation for helping to create world peace.... Which one of us does not want to be treated with respect? And who among us does not respond favorably when treated as such? When someone is kind to you, it is so easy to be kind in return. When someone is fair with you, the natural response is to treat them in the same manner. (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Stop, Walk, Talk: The Answer to Anger?

One of the greatest challenges we face as parents is helping our children deal with their anger. They can easily become frustrated and may lash out in anger and cause harm to themselves or another. Understanding what frustration is and where it actually comes from is essential to their development. Using simple and highly effective strategies to manage it is a vital necessity for their well-being. (By Janet Pfeiffer, Family Magazine)

Race is not a color...

Who came up with this idea of different races anyway? Does anyone of us know? Who gave that person the authority to decide that because our bodies are covered with skin of different shades of the same color that we are automatically classified as being of different 'races'? And we bought into it - how naive! (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Violence Escalates For Teen Girls Dating

Are you a teen involved in a relationship that is uncomfortable or unsafe? Are you the parent, relative or friend of that teen? You need to know that teen dating violence and abuse is a very serious epidemic that is becoming increasingly more prevalent in our society. (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Tell them how much they mean to your life

A Manageable Resolution: What if you made the decision to reach out to one person in your life who really made a difference and let them know that? (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Don't be like McGreeveys

Child's play in divorce leaves kids deeply scarred... (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Police Officer and Janet Pfeiffer talk about Bullies on Fox TV.

Television Interview: School bullying has transformed over the years from children picking on others at the playground to sending death threats online. (About Janet Pfeiffer - By Matt Manochio Daily, Record)

Learning To Get Along With Your Neighbors

Insightful tips for resolving a dispute with a neighbor...   (By Janet Pfeiffer, AIM Jefferson)

Forgiving Someone Powerful Decision

Forgiveness is the path to healing on every level: emotional, spiritual and physical. (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

We Fail To Teach Respect For All Life

As adults, it is our responsibility to be the role models that our children aspire to emulate. Some adults are more concerned with pursuing their own lives than focusing on guiding and molding the attitudes, hearts and minds of their children.   (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

People Must Bear Diversity in Opinion

Read a few suggestions on how to debate with dignity...   (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Get a Grip on Anger to Avoid Road Rage

Each year, thousands of motorists are killed due to road rage. What people don't know about anger can kill them. Reading this article could save your life.   (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Bullies Not Bad, Just Troubled Kids

Bullying can lead to low self-esteem, which leads to a whole host of other problems, including lower grades, isolation, depression and much more.   (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)

Want to Control Your Anger? Here's How!

Anger management is about being able to recognize what anger is, how to process it, express it, use it constructively, and let it go.   (About Janet Pfeiffer, By Michael Daigle, Daily Record)

25 Years of Power Walking; Never Missed a Day

Janet Pfeiffer hasn't missed one day since she started power walking on Jan. 20, 1982 -- 25 years ago.   (About Janet Pfeiffer, By Matt Manochio, Daily Record )

Celebrate Long Life, Don't Hate Older Age

"Being more than half a century old has its perks. With age, comes so many gifts that youth is not privy to." (By Janet Pfeiffer, Daily Record)